Confession time. Back in my care-free, gluteny years, I was a terrible beer snob. I went to real ale pubs and hung out with CAMRA members who had big beards before they were cool. These guys schooled me on “foaming, hoppy, nut brown ales” and sneered at lager drinkers.
I drank Harvey’s, Dark Star, Hobgoblin, Crossbuttock Ale, Blonde Bombshell, Hoptimus Prime… the dafter the name the better, really.
Then, 10 years ago, I found out I was coeliac. And I grieved for my old friend, beer, with all its barley loveliness.
It was quite an adjustment. I went to a beer festival for a work Christmas do but they had run out of cider so I was forced to drink pints of cheap red wine. I remember feeling rather sorry for myself… then just feeling rather drunk.
Back then, there wasn’t a whiff of gluten-free beer on the market.
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Recently, supermarket shelves have started filling with delicious GF ales. Against the Grain, Brewdog Punk, St Peter’s (with its chunky green bottle), Old Speckled Hen, Celia. Some fancy pants stuff.
But I’ve now realised what I’ve been missing the most. A basic, mainstream, oh-go-on-I’ll-have-another-seven lager.
And I finally found one. Don’t tell my CAMRA mates, but you can get gluten-free Stella now – and it is the best boozy thing I’ve had down my neck in ages. It tastes like Stella. Just a simple, no frills, easy-to-neck lager. Yes, I know GF Peroni exists. But Stella tasted a bit more wahey to my neglected tastebuds.
It’s like, I’m happy that so much gluten-free food on the menu is healthy and worthy these days. But quite often I’m sitting there picking at my chickpea quinoa burger with courgetti side but I’m actually lusting after a dirty Big Mac.
I managed to pick up four bottles of GF Stella for £4 in Tesco the other day. And, cheers, they found their way into my recycling bin all too quickly.