Having a child with a food allergy means you have to be on your toes at all times.
I mean, I had no idea that the creamy white fondant in the middle of a Creme Egg actually contains egg! My daughter, who has a severe egg allergy, found out the hard way. After I gave her a chocolate egg at a toddlers’ Easter egg hunt, she tried it and within minutes I knew something was wrong. She complained of feeling unwell and her mouth was a little red and swollen. I recognised the signs – she was reacting to something.
I had even checked the ingredients on the wrapping but the foil was so delicate and tore too easily and I missed that oh-so important three-letter word: egg.
We headed to A&E where she was monitored and recovered. But I could not forgive myself for being so careless and giving her something that could potentially kill her. I shed a few tears of guilt after causing her such distress.
It is such a fine-balance living with a child with allergies. You desperately want them to be included in everything and not feel left out and different from other children.
I have lost count of the number of times I have delved into other parents’ bins (with their permission, I may add) to double-check the ingredients on food that is to be served, such as checking the sausage she is about to eat does not contain egg. I am lucky I have a fantastic circle of friends who understand the dangers and go out of their way to accommodate her restricted diet. If she is invited to tea at a friend’s house, I either buy a brand of food we know is safe or they double-check with me first.
But accidents do happen.
Would you believe that one Chewit contains enough egg to cause a reaction? Someone even asked if it was OK for my daughter to have one and I agreed – it never crossed my mind that that innocent square sweetie would contain egg! But yes, it does.
We go to birthday parties prepared and when a pass-the-parcel layer is unwrapped and out falls a mini Milky Way or Mars bar, my daughter always glances up at me to see if the treat is safe to eat. I often have to dash over to substitute a chocolate with something she can enjoy. She doesn’t know anything different – it is all she has ever known.
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If I beat myself up for our rare slip-ups, imagine how I reacted when someone else gave her such a serious reaction that I had to dial 999. It occurred following a lunch at a well-known chain of restaurants. I had checked with the waiter if the chicken nuggets contained egg (sometimes they do and sometimes they don’t) and was assured that they didn’t.
Being a nervous mother, I explained the reason I was asking was because my daughter suffered from a serious food allergy and please could the waiter double-check with the chef for my peace of mind. The waiter was lovely and trotted off to check and came back assuring me that the meal was fine. The nuggets were devoured and I thoroughly enjoyed lunching out with my little one.
But in the car on the way home, my daughter became a little subdued and sleepy and whiny (I actually thought she had overeaten). She then developed a cough, so I thought she was starting with the usual toddler-type cold virus. An hour later, she was scratching her legs. I removed her little tights to reveal the tell-tale nettle-type rash all over her legs and tummy. Then I saw a rash and swelling developing around her mouth.
I was so surprised – I thought serious reactions to food were almost immediate. But although she obviously had started to feel unwell quite soon after eating, the serious symptoms developed some time after she had eaten. She was lethargic, itching, coughing and obviously poorly and the only option I had was to call an ambulance and head to A&E.
My biggest concern is never knowing when a reaction will stop – I realise people have allergic reactions every day and some are more serious than others. A minor one can be managed carefully at home with Piriton, cuddles and very close monitoring but, sometimes, mother’s instinct tells you that this time it is more serious and you know you need the back-up of medical professionals.
Living with a child with allergies is hard. It involves a lot of washing-up (to avoid cross-contamination) and an awful lot of label reading in supermarkets and extra considerations so they never feel left out. But it never fails to amaze me how responsible and careful she is herself.
I have always said “my daughter is allergic to eggs”. But after the restaurant incident, it put a different perspective on her allergy for me. It made me realise just how serious her allergy was and that the carelessness of another could potentially threaten her little life.
Guest blogger – Teresa Buckle
Mother of 2 children with food allergies